Mince: Chili Edition

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This is actually a Heston Blumenthal chili recipe lazily executed by me.  I customized it to suit the family.  We use grass-fed beef from our farm Grasspunk.  I actually don’t even remember the recipe.  It goes a little something like this.

Chop some onions.

I finely dice my onions if I’m making this for my son Otto, otherwise he’ll pick each and every onion out griping at me the whole time.  Tonight’s chili was for grownups, so I did big fat chunks as quickly as possible.

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Then prepare some garlic.

I’m not a garlic basher.  I think that’s a sad way to go if you’re a garlic.  I like to chop off the top and peel.  It falls off similarly to the garlic bash method.  Then I thinly slice.  One could crush the garlic into the chili.  Mr. K will tell me that crushing is the best way.  I will say, “no it’s not.” He’ll say, “yes it is.” Me, “no it’s not.” He, “yes it is.” “No it’s not.” “Yes, it is”  We were in our late thirties at the time of that conversation.

It’s a matter of preference.  For this chili, I like the subtle garlic flavor with the thinly sliced texture.

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Duck fat in.  Butter nub in.

Ready to gently bubble the onions and garlic into translucent bliss.  Onions and Garlic go in the pan you want your chili to end up in.

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A star anise is added.

I quadrupled the recipe, so you will see a few stars in there.  I think you can over anise, so one is sufficient.  Two is too much.

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While that works, brown your mince.

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Our mince comes in burgers.  Two pack is .250 kg.  Crack ’em open and put them in your browning fry pan that is full of duck fat.  We love our duck fat.  Tallow or lard will also be lovely.

They look like this at first.

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Then after a bit of a tonging.

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Then the duck fat is doing its job.

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Then when it’s brown, add the wine.

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The Madiran is for the chef.  The bucky-fiddy Cahors is for the chili.

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Onions look lovely.  Time for tomato paste.

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Add pastechili

Mix it all about.  Let that make friends until the paste goes “brick red.”

I believe that’s what the original recipe said.  Because every time I get to this step I start singing, “she’s a brick [beat beat beat] house. Shake it down. Shake it down. Shake it down now!”
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Add the meat.

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Stir it up.  Little darling.

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Add toms.

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Add heat.

I used a little diddy I call Substance P.

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Add beef broth.  Do some salt and pep.  Then, partially cover and let it be.  Let it be chili for some minutes.

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Give is a taste.  More salt.

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Scoop or slop into a bowl.  Add some cheddar cheese, some creme fraiche, some more Substance P.  Sit down.  Enjoy.

This is the recipe I follow:
chiliI need to know the quantities of stuff and then the order they go in.  The rest I remember.  You can also add beans.  Beans don’t go well in our family.

For whatever reason or in a quick dash for a piece of paper, on the back of my chili recipe is a recipe for cement.  I think that making cement and eating chili are a nice combo.  You can also read some French lesson I failed.

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Shake it down now:

Mince: Gascon Spring Roll Edition

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I suppose these are technically Fried Vietnamese Spring Rolls, though beyond using Vietnamese rice wraps and Vietnamese rice noodles, I sort of went with it Gascon style.

Get the filling started.  Boil the water for the noodles.

Filling:

  • Local Grass-fed Mince
  • Duck Fat
  • Salt
  • Pepper
  • Carrots
  • Onions
  • Celery
  • Fish Sauce
  • Grass-fed beef broth, what, like two cups?

Load up the pan with some duck fat and chuck in your mince.

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DSC_0233Add verte-blanc-orange when things seem all browny.

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After the mirepoix gets acquainted, add a splash of fish sauce, the beef broth and begin prep for the wrapping.

Pull out a galettes de riz sized bowl and fill it with warm water.  By this time, your noodle water should be ready.  Get the colander ready and then boil your noodles.  Quick! take them out.  They don’t need long.DSC_0248

With the noodles done and the filling done, you should be ready to roll.

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Rice wrap has a quick bath in warm.

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Then, put on a plate for beef-noodle innards with a roll to follow.

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First beef filling.

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Then, some noodles.

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A snuggy roll.  Snug it in nice and tight.

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Another flip.
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Then a tuck on both ends.  Line them up on some parchment paper ready for frying.  This time, in duck fat. Ah yeah!

DSC_0279This sort of food works much better when friends and family help out.  I found it to be a lot of work all by myself.  I imagined this dish coming about in a time when family members lived close and popped by for some tea.  They see you cooking and start mumbling criticisms about how you’re doing it all wrong.  You look around for something to distract the taunting, see rice wraps, tell them, “hey! why don’t you stuff it!”  Then the afternoon unfolds in merriment and gossip with a lovely fried dumpling at the end.

DSC_0270We served with Yummy Sauce and Substance P goob.  Yummy Sauce is something that involves most of MSG’s friends and neighbors, namely, fish sauce, anchovy and tomato pastey, that I picked up at the market from the Asian stall dude.  Substance P goob is: soy sauce, Substance P and a dash of Yummy Sauce.

I was going to finish with a lovely shot of Gascon Spring Rolls on a perfectly photo fluffed plating with garnish.  When I turned around to grab a roll for its plating, they were gone.  All I have is this little buddy I sampled before frying the lot.  Noodles hanging out, next to day old Einkorn bread, snuggled against fish sauce, P goob all over the place.   It was fantastic!

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I Love Pounding Meat

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Take a little steak. Pound it like you just don’t care. Egg it then bread it and mark it with a ‘b’ and serve it up warm for kiddies and me.

Fried in tallow, you can take a tasty steak and make it accessible to children. Looks like chook, tastes like a chook finger. But it’s so much better for you.

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After the steak is cooked, chuck in some veg. Tonight we have mushies and pepps with some shallot, garlic and surpeez.
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… And for zee adults, foie gras. Our freezer is running down and … well … it’s all we have. Salt, pep, a bit of sweet, a dash of nutmeg. Sure to be yum.

Chile Relleno Surprise

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Surprise! It’s not actually chile relleno, but rather a lovely layered relleno pie to the tune of my fav Puebla dish. And probably the only Puebla dish I’m aware of.

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I saw these gorgeous peppers that spoke to me. I wasn’t sure where to go with them. Stuffed with cheese in an eggy mess was the first thing that came to mind.

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You ever skin a pepper? It’s very simple.
– A quick roast on a pan ( I used some lard. That’s how I roll. ).
– After ten minutes of hot heat oven action, sweat it in a bag. — Prepare some cheese or chop something while you wait some minutes.
– Pull one out and peel off the skin. It’s very thin. Like a Kimono bursted.
– You are left with soft, silky peppers.

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With last night’s mushies and green beans, I layered like this in a lard coated loaf pan:

– pepper
– mushie bean mix
– zuch
– roughly mixed egg
– cheese, easy going melty stuff

: rinse and repeat

The last layer is pepper followed by cheese

I cooked in an average oven until browny and melty.

Cheese:
If in France, a young Gouda and/or Comte

Otherwise, Jack or Moz

Guess What I’m Making?

DSC_9906Where there is beef, there are beef bones.

DSC_9898Massaged with lard, salted and pepped. Then roasted until brown.

DSC_9912Extra flavor rescued with a spatula or a little red wine.

Add then the celery, carrots, onions punctured with cloves, the bay leaves, the thyme and anything else you can find.

DSC_9917Things bubble and toil.  Hours later, some healthy beef broth to sip or soup.

Tonight, Olives For Dinner

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It’s hot. I’m sick. The kids are on the verge of a summer vacation. For some reason – it may be the porky Mexican Guac fiesta for lunch – I’m not all that hungry. But, damn those olives. Is it the salt? The fat? The vinegar? Who knows, but Olives-It’s what’s for dinner. I just can’t get enough. So I leave you with an olive-worthy tune by B. Mars. Treasure. Poo. No official vid. So imagine M.J. + Earth + Wind + Fire == Olives for dinner.

You can hum this. Spit out the pits.

Cheesy Poofs, Cheesy Flops

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I loves me some cheesy poofs. My super bargain oven makes cheesy poofs like nobody’s bidness. Though if your batter is runny, you will most certainly make cheesy flops thus setting up your evening for sadness and despair. Nobody wants a cheesy flop. Sure, they taste okay, but the crunch and fluff of a proper cheesy poof makes giggles happen.

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I use the Saveur recipe which works perfectly if you pay attention to a few things.

1) runny batter makes flops. Add more flour.

2) salt and pepper and then salt and pepper again. It makes a difference

3) oven is set to super hot, but not too hot. My oven runs hot. Too hot, too quick and you get a flop. Hot and steady ( like my men ) and you will arrive at poofdom.

Recipe is :

115g butter
1/2 c milk
1/2 c water
Sal n Pepe
1c flour
4 eggs
1c melty cheese

Make a roux
Add eggs one at a time
Add cheese

Spoon on a pan
Top with milk and cheese

Cook until poofy
Happy happy joy joy

Garlic!

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I remembered to plant garlic in the autumn. I found time to keep it free of weeds. Now, I get to enjoy my efforts. This garlic is going into a little zuch, tom, fennel number to be served with big arse pork leg. My iPhone touch screen smells lovely.